"You will have to marry him, and that's final!" I can still hear my stepmom's words ringing in my ears.

Without her, I wouldn't be in this mess that I'm currently in.

She was the one who forced me here just so she can save her crumbling business.

Sly is the most sought after billionaire in uzom City, but he's not the most sought husband.

Why he agreed to my stepmom's arrangements was beyond me.

Why accept to marry a person you don't love and don't have any hope of loving?

I just don't get his reasons for accepting the deal, since it's obvious, that he feels absolutely nothing for me.

Living in this mansion all alone can make a sane person run mad.

Ever since I stepped foot into his abode, since the moment I said I do, I've been locked in this prison of a mansion.

I have everything I can ever want, maids to do me every bidding, but what I want most among all others wasn't given to me.

I know I was forced into this marriage, but that didn't mean I won't make the best of it, A person makes the best of any situation they find themselves in.

"I'm off to work," I watch Sly leave.

No goodbye kiss, no see you later, he just left.

This is his typical morning ritual, he passes by and mutters his departure, and when he returns in the evening he will still mutter an 

 'I'm back' to me.

What does it matter to me whether he's back or not?

It's not like they make a difference, his appearance, and disappearance make no difference to me.

Almost a year here, and I haven't for one day felt at home, I haven't felt the touch of another on me.

I was living a celibate life, he doesn't touch me, and he won't allow another person to do the job.

Not only am I not allowed outside, but he expertly made sure the connection I had with the outside world is completely cut off.

As a young student who just graduated from high school, I had my hopes set on completing my university education, leaving home, and falling for the only male I'll love for the rest of my life, but life doesn't seem to go the way we want it to be.

It's as if fate is trying to play a sick joke on me.

*

I can still vividly recall the day I made the first step, a day I still regret until now, a day I wish to blot from existence.

It was two weeks after our marriage, and I felt he wasn't initiating intimacy due to his shyness, but I thought wrong.

He wasn't shy, he wasn't ready to initiate intimacy with a person he doesn't feel any attraction towards.

The day began too like it does since I married him, he passed by me and muttered his 'I'm off to work' slang.

The night was still the same with him passing me and muttering "I'm back".

I had everything planned, from my seduction to our ultimate coupling.

"You have to sacrifice what you have to get what you want," that was my stepmom'swords as I said my farewell to my father.

She pulled me to a side, "don't disappoint me, my hope lies on you not disappointing us. You have to please him for us to get what we want. Before you attain your peak, something must give, you have to sacrifice little to gain more."

That was her version of motherly advice to me.

I wore the tightest undies I have with me (mind you, I haven't been with anyone before, but I can't help being prepared) to get his attention on me.

I believe I will set the location and allow the car to drive me.

Well, to cut the long story short, he gave me the cold shoulder when I walked in on him bathing.

"You're worse than a scum under my shoes, you're not worthy of touching me, you gold-digging bitch."

I can still recall his words and the tone he said them.

"I rather allow a street urchin to touch my skin than allow someone like you to do the job."

The words stabbed straight into my heart.

l felt a kind of constricting pain I haven't felt in my life, it was as if someone drove a stack into my heart.

"If you hate me this much, why did you agree to the marriage?

Why did you sign the certificate?"

I still don't get it.

Why will he sign a certificate he would rather not sign and get shackled with a husband he didn't want?

Why go to all that trouble to get married to a person you don't like?

It's too early for love, but at least can't he love me despite the circumstances of our marriage?

"I couldn't bear to see your pathetic self when your mom presented the proposal. You looked as if you needed help, and an out from her clutches.

So, I gave you one.

I gave you what you badly required, and yet, you wouldn't give me what I silently asked for?

You're just a gold-digging ingrate like your mom," he banged the door to the bathroom shut.

I was left standing in front of the door, looking like a fool who just forgot the way to his house.

Even then, the so-called fool is better than I, at least he might find his way home, but I don't have any hope of finding a home.

Home?

Is that even something that exists for me, for someone like me?

Someone who doesn't deserve to be loved, someone who deserves whatever is handed to him.

That Someone is me, and there's no hope of tomorrow, no hope of a place to call home, a person to call mine.

I legit cried myself to sleep that night, vowing that I will never put myself in the position I earlier did, I will never stoop so low as to repeat the mistakes of earlier.

*

I took my plates to the kitchen * I work whenever I have to* it's too damn boring to sit alone in a house as big as this.

Not only am I not allowed out, I'm not allowed a gadget. The only thing I have free access to is the television, and even that is monitored.

The first day was like a paradise to me, sitting undisturbed at home without my stepmom disturbing me.

The second day was like a vacation to me, I get to sit and watch my favourite movie series, drink anything I want, and eat to my heart's content.

Seven days into it lost all attractions, I was bored beyond comprehension.