Dylan
By the time I regained consciousness, it was almost dusk, and I was alone, as usual.
Why?
Why must it always be like this?
Even when I'm trying to help, nothing goes the way I think it will. It would help if I could actually remember how it ended, but maybe it's for the best. The way my body hurts, I'm sure that I lost this fight as well.
Who ever said no good dead goes unpunished was full of sh*t. Being punished is one of the most reliable parts of this miserable life. Expecting anything other than pain and misery is a child's fantasy, and I stopped believing in fairy tales long ago.
There was a dull pulsing on the right side of my head and I could feel a pulling sensation amid the pain and I was sure that the newly knitted skin there meant I have been out for some time.
Finally able to roll over to my back, I decided to just lay here and watch as the sky finished its transition from day to night. I love the night time, the air, the way the sky sparkles like it's full of fireflies, and the feel of the breeze on my hot skin.
That's when I heard it, the soft crunch of grass being stepped on. Too bad I wasn't in the mood to reopen my cuts. I just stayed laying there staring at the sky.
I couldn't scent who was coming because the smell of my own blood was so thick in my nose.
Moving still hurt, so instead of turning my head, I waited until the person was in my peripheral to identify my unexpected guest.
"Are you awake?"
I immediately recognized that soft, squeaky voice. It was Lecia.
As she walked slowly over to me, I saw she was carrying something in her arms. It was a large bundle, but I couldn't turn my head to get a good enough look at it.
I didn't respond to her because I knew she wouldn't have walked over to me if she thought I was still knocked out. Now that she was in my line of sight, I could clearly see that she had a blanket, a thermos, and what looked like a sandwich wrapped in plastic wrap.
"Are you okay?"
Lecia came up to me and kneeled next to my chest, but not close enough to touch me. I still didn't respond to her because I was unsure what she wanted from me and why she was here.
To show me pity?
To thank me for helping her?
To ridicule me for ending up like this?
The silence stretched out much too long, and I was about to try to get myself up off the ground when she practically threw the things in her arms at me. "Oh, please don't leave. I brought these things for you."
I felt a little attacked, but once I had hold of it all, she bowed towards me and began to sob.
Leave? I could barely move, much less leave. So, before trying to sit up, I reached out to Rae. I immediately felt her warmth radiate through my body and give me a little boost of energy. It wasn't much, but it was enough to push me up into a sitting position.
Tremors rocked through her and at first it was hard to hear what she was saying through her cries, but eventually I could make out one sentence," I'm so sorry this happened to you because you tried to help me!"
No one had ever thanked me before, for anything really, and it wasn't joy or appreciation that I felt in that moment, but hesitation. I didn't want her pity. I didn't need her to feel sorry for me. I didn't help her for the accolades. I helped her because I physically couldn't stand back and let someone get hurt like that.
Discomfort was setting in and I was not a charity case. I planned on keeping the sandwich, and maybe the thermos depending on what was in it, but I was definitely going to give her the blanket back. I slid it towards her still lowered head and slowly eased up off the ground while holding the rest of the stuff in my hands.
"Look, it's no big deal. I'm sure that if you came across someone getting beat up that you would have done the same thing." I mean, wouldn't anyone do that if they were presented with the same situation.
There were no other words that she needed from me, and we were not friends so I turned to leave, but not before I quietly thanked her for the food.
"You're wrong."
I wasn't sure that I heard her so I just kept walking. Limping.
Limping, I just kept limping away from her and back towards my house. She must have finally gotten all her tears out because I didn't hear her come up behind me. It wasn't until she was about to reach out and grab me that Rae sent a burst of energy my way so that I could dodge her grasp.
"Didn't you hear me? I said you were wrong! I wouldn't have done that. No one does that. Not in this damn pack!"
We were a few feet away from each other and though there were no more tears, I could see the devastation on her face. I don't know what she wanted from me. Did she want me to agree with her, or refute her words. I mean, come on, I just got my ass handed to me and I wanted to go sleep in my own bed to recover.
Lecia just stood there staring at me, I could see how hard her chest rose and fell and I knew that she was probably really close to shifting, but I didn't have the energy to deal with her problems, I have plenty of my own to deal with.
Turning again to limp back towards my house, she called after me again, but this time it was a question I couldn't help but answer.
"Why?
"Why would you help me?"
"Why would you let them hurt you like that?"
Funny how everyone loves to ask the questions that are the hardest to answer. I didn't have it in me to lie, hell, I barely had it in me to walk at the moment.
"I don't know."
Apparently that wasn't a good enough answer for her. Why do people feel that they deserve answers to every question they ask, just for asking it.
It had taken much too long to take the few steps away from her that I had, but I was still well within earshot to hear her.
"Dylan, what are you, really?"
It took everything I had left to keep the tears from falling from my eyes and there was no way I would be able to do that if I looked at her, so I kept my back to her when I spoke.
"If I ever find out myself, I'll let you know."
There was no way that I was going to be able to eat or drink whatever it was that Lecia brought for me so I made sure that I was far enough away from her before discarding the sandwich and thermos by a tree.
No. I would not be indebted to anyone, even for something this small. I knew the kindness of others didn't come free and I would never put myself into a situation like that ever again.