As part of my strategy, I have been the nicest when my butler is around. I've been like the perfect diamond with regard to my attitude for as long as he is near.
The snobbish attitude of his somehow slowly fades, and I can't help but think that he is somehow warming up to me.
"Princess, please be careful," Daisuke caught me midair when I tripped down the stairs and nearly fell several steps down.
"I'm sorry, I'm quite heavy..." I said as I felt him carry me bridal style, then ever so gently sat me on a chair.
He knelt in front of me and slowly took off my shoes, "Ahem. Believe me when I say, you are as light as a feather. You twisted your ankle, does it hurt?"
Considering how short I am compared to him, even in this position, I feel his presence so consciously.
He examined my feet and caressed them ever so gently, his eyes never leaving mine.
He was breathtaking. As the light refracted some of its brilliance to his silver hair, I couldn't help but think of the clouds under the morning sun.
"I'm okay, I'm sorry for being a bother. I'm too clumsy that I become too much of a burden," I tried to avoid his blue Celtic eyes that seem to hypnotize me to look a bit more closely and to stare a bit longer.
"You are never a bother to me, Princess. You are a lot of things, but never that," his mesmerizing blue eyes start to turn dark blue as he looked at me as if he was in a trance.
He was transfixed as if he was in the presence of a goddess, I'm not sure, but that is exactly how the way he looked at me made me feel.
"But it is not your duty to save me all the time, to help me all the time. I should be able to take care of myself," I tried to rationalize with him even when I hear my heart thumping fast.
"Princess, I want you to depend on me. For as long as I can, I want to be the one to protect and serve you. For as long as you allow me, I want to dedicate my whole life to serving you," Daisuke said, even as I felt his expert hands massaging my feet ever so gently.
"Let me take care of you princess. It is my joy to be always by your side," I tried to stop my heart from going crazy when he said the line, but to no avail.
The feel of his skin on mine, the gentle strokes from his skillful fingers, and the way he held my feet like it was a truly beautiful thing to cherish.
Doesn't this exactly feel like an anime? The otaku in me just becomes so flustered that every minute spent with him seems to keep me too warm.
I'm sure this is just me being reminded of the perfect anime scene, or the writer in me falling in love with beautiful plots. I'm sure everything is just as simple as that.
But no matter how hard I try to convince myself... why is it that my heart doesn't slow down? Why is it running a marathon by itself? Silly heart, stop being a pain!
Before my mind can understand what it was he will be doing, his lips found my injured foot and kissed it.
"Daisuke, don't," my mind wandered to the sixth heaven and back again to this world when he did that. I never thought he will be able to do that, or that any person can ever do that for me.
"Ahem. Your majesty, do you feel better now? Did the pain ease somehow?" He said, still holding my foot so tenderly while looking into my eyes.
"Yes, but... your lips have been dirtied," I said, taking my handkerchief to wipe it away.
I patted his lips with my handkerchief, "You shouldn't have... You shouldn't have..."
His hand is suddenly on my wrist, removing the handkerchief ever so swiftly. The skillful, beautiful butler. How in all the world am I supposed to maintain distance from all of this?
"My princess, not one part of you can ever be dirty. Each corner of your body, every single inch... is a masterpiece," he told me while looking into my eyes.
How can I not feel delighted in what he just said when every word seems to be coated with sincerity?
"Thank you, Daisuke," I said as I looked at the handsome gentleman kneeling before me, cradling my injured foot close to his heart.
x x x x
I have resigned myself from pursuing the idea of romantic love. So, it should have been easy to get the scene out of my mind.
And yet, I couldn't even get a wink of sleep, my mind completely plagued by the scene earlier today.
"You are destined to hurt me. Destined to have me killed. One day when you meet her, you will fall in love. A love beyond reasons, and you shall hurt me in return," I whispered in the night air.
What will I do then? Can I fight back? Or will I let those blue eyes be the ones I last see as I meet my untimely death?
No matter how hard it is, I'm supposed to want to live.
But the idea of him not caring for me any longer. The idea of him falling for someone entirely different from me. The idea of him forgetting the words he just said... it makes me lose the will to live.
I don't know how it can be, but the more I know him. The more I can't tolerate the knowledge that he is destined to hurt me.
"Stop being emotional! You can't have a crush on a stupid storybook character, Maru!" I said aloud, as I pulled the covers on top of my head.
"This is just a product of your imagination! This is just the otaku in you, seeing romance when there is none! Stop being gullible, Maru!"
"That man is no Levi! He is no Kurama! He is not a Hotohori! That man... is someone who is destined to kill you. So stop falling for his charms," I castigated myself, frustrated about how my heart doesn't seem to mind.
"This is no role play! Your life is on the line! So, you have to live. Please Maru, don't die once again, not before you fully lived," I reminded myself.
"For the sake of the one unloved, unnoticed, unwanted... you have to live for yourself, Maru."